Lucky 13

It was half my life time ago - at the age of 13 - when my mom got the call. She picked me up from school in a rush of excitement and unanswered questions so we could make the drive to the hospital nursery to pick the baby girl up and take her home with us. Despite the Social Worker saying it was a temporary placement, I was ecstatic to know that a newborn little girl was going to be my new foster sister for the time being.

I'll never forget walking into the quiet, dimly-lit room where the most beautiful little baby that I had ever seen contently lain in her hospital bassinet. A maternity nurse was examining her and trying to conduct a test by placing her tiny foot into a bowl of water. The nurse briefly glanced over her shoulder and softly explained that she was trying to make the baby tinkle because they wanted to test her urine for any traces of drugs. After a few minutes, the nameless baby cooperated and the nurse took her sample to have it checked out. It tested free and clear. My mom swooped in to take her and we both looked at her with absolute adoration. Our hearts instantly melted. The social worker said that her birth mother had not given her a name, so my mom came up with "Maria" by the time our elevator had taken us to the first floor. I instantly added "Rose" as her middle name. Maria Rose. My Rosey Bear.

I was on cloud nine and didn't even care that I had to return back to my 8th grade school day because all of my friends wanted to know why I had been mysteriously called out of English class earlier. When the school bus finally dropped me off at the end of our driveway at 3:40 pm, I took the shortcut through the field to run to her as fast as I could. It wasn't fast enough. Nick had already swooped her up and was not about to hand her over. I don't think that little baby was put back in her crib for the rest of the day between all of us wanting to hold her, feed her, and cuddle that 6 lb 14 oz bundle. She had the softest wispy curls covering her perfect head, the tiniest button nose, and thick, curly eyelashes framing her chocolate-colored eyes.

It was exactly 13 years ago that my mom got that phone call.

That sweet little baby is a mere shadow of the girl I see today, and it's becoming clearer and clearer that she is transforming into a young lady before my very eyes. I am filled with a mixture of a big sister's want to protect, provide, and guide, but also be one who she can turn to for anything; a listening ear, a shoulder to cry on, reassurance and lots of laughs and giggles.

In looking back on my own teen years I recognize that some great things happened during that period, but I am also reminded of the hardships that peers can bring, the things that I wish I would have done or wouldn't have done, and the acceptance that most of the people who were so very important to me then are strangers now.

Of course I want my sister to learn from my choices, but I also completely understand and support that her path is her own - it is uncharted and the potential is limitless.

Here is my list of things to keep in mind as you begin your teen years, dear sister:

1. God made you exactly how He wanted you: incredibly smart, talented, hilarious, beautiful, strong-willed, opinionated, and perfectly imperfect - just the way you are.

2. At one point or another, all girls feel a little freaked out about their bodies and all of those funky changes going on.  No matter how big that pimple is on your face, somebody else has one bigger.  Be proud to be turning into a woman, and (reread #1.)

3. ...Do not measure your worth by comparing yourself to someone else. You will never look like them or think like them, just as they will never look or think like you! That is how it's supposed to be. (Reread #1.)

4. Walk down the hallway with your head up and dare to look at AND smile at everyone - teachers and students alike (even if they're older!) I guarantee you will make somebody else smile because (reread #1)

5. As tempting as it may be to start “going out” with a boy, he is most definitely not worth your time, and believe me when I say that high school boys are lusting big time over any girl who gives them the time of day.  (Reread #1, please.)

6. Try as many new activities as you can (you are already really good at this), but it's more fun if you're involved because (reread #1.)

7. Really try to be patient and kind to mom and dad. I know they're “old & don't know anything,” but they would do anything for you and love you so much. We are so lucky to have them as our parents. 

8. NEVER, ever, ever, ever say something about someone that you wouldn't say to their face. Ever.

10. Do your best, try your hardest, give it your all.. whatever it is - but don't beat yourself up if you don't get a perfect score on that test or assignment because (reread #1)

11. Laugh at yourself.  If you fall down the stairs and your books and papers go flying everywhere, stand up tall, brush it off, take a deep breath and laugh because (reread #1)

12. Don't get wrapped up in wearing the name-brand stuff.  Of course it's fun to have a few of those things, but does wearing clothes from Hollister make you a better person?  Absolutely not!  Reread #1.

13. You have been blessed with so many gifts and if you continue to work hard, you can do anything you set your mind to. Reread #1.

13. You have a sister who is one of your biggest fans! Don't be afraid to ask for help and you know that you can talk to me about anything.  (Reread #1.)

Over the years and in so many ways, that little girl has impacted my days, influenced me, cheered me up, given me strength and reminded me of what really matters. I know that she was hand chosen by God to be brought into my life 13 years ago and become my little sister. I love you, Rosey!


Do you like Dylan's Carebear pj's? Here we are on that very day: April 22, 1999. Mom made me wear that shirt.